Dont Let the Midget Out of the Wardrobe: The Wit and Wisdom of Sleep Talkin Man Karen Slavick-Lennard

ISBN: 9780802170934

Published: June 5th 2012

Paperback

192 pages


Description

Dont Let the Midget Out of the Wardrobe: The Wit and Wisdom of Sleep Talkin Man  by  Karen Slavick-Lennard

Dont Let the Midget Out of the Wardrobe: The Wit and Wisdom of Sleep Talkin Man by Karen Slavick-Lennard
June 5th 2012 | Paperback | PDF, EPUB, FB2, DjVu, AUDIO, mp3, RTF | 192 pages | ISBN: 9780802170934 | 3.49 Mb

Im sure a few of you who know me well have heard me tell the story of how my husband talks in his sleep. He does this almost every night, and often rewards me with funny little gems to share with all of you.The one that hes most know for within my GR circle of friends : Were about to get our asses kicked, and I have nothing but this pair of chopsticks.Yes, thats right.

My husband was ready to defend our safety against God-only-knows-who with a pair of chopsticks. Ive also been privileged to hear about alien invasions, corporate takeovers, and MMA smackdowns.So of course when I saw this book, I immediately knew I was going to have to read it. The version I have was sent as a galley for a shorter title, Sleep Talkin Man, but I gather this is the same book.Let me just note right off that there are so many 5 star moments in this book.

If, in fact, you were going to use this book as a bathroom book or a joke-a-day type of book, Id say its a five star read. The things that this womans husband says in his sleep (she spent a significant amount of time actually recording it for playback later) are HILARIOUS. I would recommend that if you were to read Sleep Talkin Man do this - stick the book somewhere (in your bathroom, your car, etc.) where youre only going to be reading it for a couple of minutes at a time.

DONT attempt to sit down and read this book through as if its a novel. Because as a novel, its a very weak 3 stars at best, regardless of how much comic gold is in the book. After all, who wants to sit down and read 100 plus pages full of short quips and one liners?That said, this woman...I give her an overseas high five.

She is my Brit twin. She has insomnia, while her husband can fall asleep within 10 seconds. Thats SO me. She lays awake playing internet sudoku (I play mine on the Nook) and gets to listen to her husband talk about random crap. Thats SO me. I wish I could meet up with this chick for lunch sometime and compare notes. She gets some major kudos for thinking to document her husbands ramblings for book purposes. I, however, was SITTING ON A GOLD MINE this entire time and didnt know it!Heres a few random snippets from the book to show you what she (and I by proxy) have to live with :Hands up who wants sweets!

Hands up! Aww, youve got no hands. Sucks to be you, sweets for me.Go on, cry motherfucker. Im gonna dip my dim sum in your tears.Youre gonna have to shave your pubes. Its like fighting an army of permed spider legs down there, and Im gonna lose. Im gonna lose.Youve got an issue with my goat, you got an issue with me.

Come on, goat. Were going somewhere where were welcome.Of course the zombie loved me. She gave me her heart.My ponys for sale...Yes, it fucking works!Oh, I hope you take this advice to heart : you look fat when you cry.This little tampon went out, this little tampon stayed home. This little tampon had an applicator, this little tampon had none. This little tampons covered in...poop. WRONG HOLE, PEOPLE! Wrong hole.Im bored. Lets go and trip some old people.I need you to take this stapler and ram it into your forehead.

No, it wont solve the problem, but it will make me happier.Sigh. I should have been recording all this time.This book was provided from the publisher through Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.



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